So I was lying on a couch in Kim's hospital room at least 10 feet away from her, when we have this conversation...Me: reading something - when I subtly "let one go". (i.e. silent and harmless fart)
Not 2 seconds later....
Kim: Did you fart? (lying on her bed)
Me: Huh? (incredulous that anyone could smell anything that quickly)
Kim: Did you fart?
Me: Uhhhh....yeah, like 2 seconds ago. (sniffing the air)...I can't even smell anything.
Kim: Well, I can....and it stinks.
Me: Sorry. (sheepish grin)
Thinking about it some more....
Me: How did you smell that?!?
Kim: I don't know.
Me: I think it's the chemo they gave you. It makes you nauseous and now you have this super-human ability to smell.
Kim: shrugging shoulders
Me: Great....so I'm going to have to hold my farts for the next 4 months?
Kim: Yep.
Me: Hey...I've got toxins that need to be released from my body too!
(both laughing....)
It then dawned on me that there may be some truth in saying when it comes to cancer....the spouse has it harder than the patient. God help me.
---------------------
Trust me. I was not looking for an opportunity to share about my very private gastrointestinal issues. But someone told me yesterday that laughter is clinically proven to help cancer cure rates. So please follow my lead and share a joke, funny story, etc by inserting a "Comment" below (could be anything - about life, Kim, me, anyone or anything). It just has to be relatively clean (I just set the low bar) and it has to make Kim laugh. I'll give a prize to the best entry submitted in the next 24 hours!
Game on!!!
P.S. Still no word on when the Rituxan will start up again (probably soon) - but please pray that Kim will respond well to it. Thank you.
Riding through an unfamiliar city can be confusing. My husband was driving, and I sat in the passenger seat with the map. Our 2 year old sat harnessed down in the back seat. The conversation went like this. him: "Where do I turn?" me:"Turn at the next light". him: "this light?" me:"This light." me: "Like right here." Followed by one final "it's now or never!" as we pass the intersection.
ReplyDeleteOur car falls silent as he continues to drive straight when a tiny 2 year old voice from the back seat cuts the tension with "Guess it's never".
Can you imagine what it might be like to be married to Buddy the Elf?! I CAN! urgh....
ReplyDeleteIn the local mostly Mexican grocery store with my dear husband recently when some used-to-be-popular-in-the-early-80s song came on. He turned to me and VERY, VERY loudly and VERY EXCITEDLY said: "UH! I LOOOOVE THIS SONG!"
Yes, people looked at us like we were freaks. I was laughing and STILL did not get any sympathy glances.
Jen and I were on our yearly trip out east to visit her grandparents. Jen's brother and his wife had joined us for this trip. Early in the trip, our sister-in-law had gotten sick and actually had to go to the ER to get checked out. It turned out to be nothing serious, but she needed to take some medication for a few days to correct the issue. After a couple of days, she still was feeling the effects. We then saw her the next day and asked her how she was doing. The conversation went like this...
ReplyDeleteMe: How are you feeling?
Her: Much better. It turns out I was taking my medicine wrong.
Me (without skipping a beat): Oh, were you supposed to take it orally?
3 things happened after this:
1.) Everyone burst out laughing
2.) Jen's aunt couldn't look at me without laughing the rest of the trip
3.) The sister-in-law didn't talk to me for a few days
first rectal exam i did as a 3rd year medical student - i was young, scared, and thrown into the wolves all alone. i could tell something was off but couldn't put my finger on it (no pun intended). then suddenly it hit me. most doctors wear gloves during rectal exams.
ReplyDeletemoral of the story: don't let a 3rd year medical student touch you, ever.
ps i figured with pete's bar set so low, i could comfortably share this story. i won't confirm or deny it in person though.
My 21 year marriage to my beautiful wife continues, by His grace, to get better and evolve - but in the case with Christmas presents, de-volve is more descriptive.
ReplyDeleteWhen we first met and early in our marriage, her Christmas gifts to me were thoughtful clothing items, or tickets to a much-anticipated show, or dinner at a nice restaurant, followed by sweet, caring words like "I thought you would like it because..."
This year, as I opened my present, I was greeted with what sounded a little like a velled threat... "Do you like it because we can't return it!"
(Peter, how comfortable are those hospital couches?)
Kim, we love you and continue to keep you in our prayers!
Props to my mom for sending me this funny email:
ReplyDeleteChurch Ladies With typewriters . . .
They're Back! Those wonderful Church Bulletins! Thank God for church
ladies with typewriters. These sentences (with all the BLOOPERS)
actually appeared in church bulletins or were announced in church
services:
The sermon this morning: 'Jesus Walks on the Water.' The sermon
tonight: 'Searching for Jesus.'
Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of
those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.
Don't let worry kill you off - let the Church help.
Miss Charlene Mason sang 'I will not pass this way again,' giving
obvious pleasure to the congregation.
For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a
nursery downstairs.
Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the
help they can get.
A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall.
Music will follow..
At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be 'What Is
Hell?' Come early and listen to our choir practice.
Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of
several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.
Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be
recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.
The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment
and gracious hostility.
Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM - prayer and medication to follow.
This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn singing in the park across
from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.
Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10 AM . All ladies
are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B. S. is done.
Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM . Please use
the back door.
The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the
Church basement Friday at 7 PM . The congregation is invited to attend
this tragedy.
Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church.
Please use large double door at the side entrance.
The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new campaign slogan last
Sunday: 'I Upped My Pledge - Up Yours.
Angela and I hope these bring you some laughter.
Before Annie and I were married, (ah, the sweet days of courtship), we were on our way to (or from, it doesn't matter) a retreat, when I was extremely impressed by her keen sense of smell (if memory serves me correctly, we were passing through cow country and she was the first one to comment on the odor). As I was attempting to compliment and encourage my girlfriend with my charm and wit, I blurted out, "You smell like a dog!", meaning that her nasal prowess was most acute and impressive. No sooner than those words escape my mouth, did I see the glare of death (it's so hard not to smile and laugh because she's so cute when she makes her 'angry face'). Needless to say, by the grace of God, she agreed to marry me a couple years later. Even though I have a healthy habit of "open mouth insert foot".
ReplyDeleteLike a dog that returns to his vomit is a fool who repeats his folly. --Proverbs 26:11
Walked in on a conversation b/t my boys-
ReplyDeleteS: "Fur, I love you sooo much, so so so much."
[my face = :D]
(S sees that I'm there listening and continues to say) "Cuz God tells us to love our enemies, right Mommy?"
[my face = :?]
Peter and Kim, we've been praying for you from St. Louis and Brian had the chance yesterday to ask our Crossroads family to keep you all in prayer.
ReplyDeleteHere's one that I've always kept in my vault of funny stories:
BAD DAY
Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana. He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs. Below is an e-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent it to radio station 103.2 FM in Ft. Wayne, Indiana:
Hi Sue, Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last week had a bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not so bad after all. Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you with a few technicalities of my job. As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It's a wetsuit. This time of year the water is quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial water heater. This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the sea. It heats it to a delightful temperature. It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose.
Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it several times with no complaints. What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wetsuit. This floods my whole suit with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi. Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to itch. So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse. Within a few seconds my butt started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my back, but the damage was done. In agony I realized what had happened.
The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit. Now, since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick to it. However, the crack of my butt was not as fortunate. When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish into the crack of my butt.
I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with five other divers, were all laughing hysterically. Needless to say I aborted the dive. I was instructed to make three agonizing in-water decompression stops totaling thirty-five minutes before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry decompression.
When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet. As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my butt as soon as I got in the chamber. The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't poop for two days because my butt was swollen shut.
So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt. Now repeat to yourself, "I love my job, I love my job, I love my job." And whenever you have a bad day, ask yourself: is this a "jellyfish bad" day?
Hello! My name is Julie and I discovered your blog on FB as many of my friends have been asking for prayer for Kim and your family. I live in the Chicagoland area.
ReplyDeleteOur family journeyed down the cancer path 5 years ago when our son, Joshua, at the age of 2 1/2 was diagnosed with Wilms which is pediatric kidney cancer. His left kidney was removed, he went through 7 rounds of radiation to his stomach (due to the tumor bursting) and 6 months of chemo (which is a very short treatment plan compared to most other forms of cancer). His last visit at Children's Memorial back in September of 2011 had us rejoicing as Joshua's Oncologist placed him in the survior program! Cancer stretched us, grew us and challenged us to stand firm on Christ Jesus. He was found faithful along every mountain, valley and hill.
Anyway- getting to the point of your challenge. Our family has discovered a very hilarious Christian comedian by the name of Tim Hawkins. If you go to his website you can view many of his videos. But if you would like to keep in the same vein as your post view "Whiff of Kansas" first. It will crack you up as I'm sure the rest of the videos will too.
ENJOY!!!
http://www.timhawkins.net/video.html
In Christ,
Julie Vercouteren
Elgin, IL
First time I read the entries on this website, I literally peed in my pants. If you have an iphone, you'll know what this is about.
ReplyDeletehttp://damnyouautocorrect.com/
Praying for you, Peter and Kim!
When my daughter was 4 years old we were living in Naperville, IL. She was attending preschool at the time and the teacher asked everyone to bring a baby picture into class to play a game of "guess who am I". So she did. When I picked her up that day after school she just looked so sad. She was very quite and wasn't her self. When we got in the car she bursted into tears. I was shelled schocked because she never cries even to this day (age13). I immediately said what's wrong what happen at school...was someone mean to you or hit you....etc etc. She said no to the million questions I asked. When she settled herself down she explained to me about the guessing game at school. She said when they were playing the baby guessing game all the kids couldn't guess who everyone was, but when it came to her picture they knew right away...she started to cry and cry again. Of course I started to chuckle because it was so cute. I say that because Sophie was the only asian student in the classroom. She repeatly said it wasn't fair mommy. I miss those days!!!
ReplyDeleteTop 10 Amish Pick-up Lines
ReplyDelete10. Are thee at barn-raisings often?
9. If our religion didn't forbid the use of telephones, I would ask
thee for thy number.
8. Can I buy thee a buttermilk colada?
7. You've really got the build for that plain bonnet and shapeless
black dress.
6. Say, my favorite movie is "Witness" too!
5. Are thee a model?
4. There are so many phonies at these quilting bees. Let's go
someplace quiet.
3. They buggy has a smokin' lacquer job.
2. I got Sinatra tickets.
1. Are thee up for some plowing?
Top ten signs your Amish teen is in trouble…
10. Sometimes stays in bed until after 5 a.m.
9. In his sock drawer, you find pictures of women without bonnets.
8. Shows up at barn raisings in full “KISS” makeup.
7. When you criticize him, he yells, “Thou sucketh.”
6. His name is Jebediah, but he goes by “Jeb Daddy.”
5. Defiantly says, “If I had a radio, I’d listen to rap.”
4. You come upon his secret stash of colored socks.
3. Uses slang expression, “Talk to the hand, ‘cause the beard ain’t listening.”
2. Was recently pulled over for driving under the influence of cottage cheese.
1. He’s wearing his big black hat backwards.
I received a letter from grandma and she writes...
ReplyDeleteThe other day I went up to a local Christian bookstore and saw a "Honk if you love Jesus!" bumper sticker. I was feeling particularly sassy that day because I had just come from a thrilling choir performance, followed by a thunderous prayer meeting, so I bought the sticker and put it on my bumper. Boy, I'm glad I did! What an uplifting experience followed!
I was stopped at a red light at a busy intersection, just lost in thought about the Lord and how good He is and I didn't notice that the light had changed. It is a good thing someone else loves Jesus because if he hadn't honked, I'd never have noticed! I found that LOTS of people love Jesus!
While I was sitting there, the guy behind started honking like crazy, and then he leaned out of his window and screamed, "For the love of GOD! GO! GO! Jesus Christ, GO!" What an exuberant cheerleader he was for Jesus! Everyone started honking! I just leaned out of my window and started waving and smiling at all these loving people. I even honked my horn a few times to share in the love!
There must have been a man from Florida back there because I heard him yelling something about a "sunny beach". I saw another guy waving in a funny way with only his middle finger stuck up in the air. I asked my teenage grandson in the back seat what that meant, he said that it was probably a Hawaiian good luck sign or something. Well, I've never met anyone from Hawaii, so I leaned out the window and gave him the good luck sign back. My grandson burst out laughing. He was enjoying this religious experience, too!
A couple of the people were so caught up in the joy of the moment that they got out of their cars and started walking towards me. I bet they wanted to pray or ask what church I attended, but this is when I noticed the light had changed.
So, I waved to all my sisters and brothers grinning, and drove on through the intersection. I noticed I was the only car that got through the intersection before the light changed again and I felt kind of sad that I had to leave them after all the love we had shared, so I slowed the car down, leaned out of the window and gave them all the Hawaiian good luck sign one last time as I drove away.
Praise the Lord for such wonderful folks!
Grandma
Katie(6), Ellie(3), and I were at the kitchen table eating. I decided to ask Ellie a question.
ReplyDeleteMe: Ellie, how do you spell your name?
E: E-L-L-I-E.
Me: good. How do you spell Katie un-nee's name?
E: K-D
Both Katie and I started laughing.
Me: how about daddy's name?
E: N-D
Me: Your name is not spelled L-E ?
E: no. it's E-L-L-I-E
I got lot of work to do with her. ;)
-Susie
I like to clap real loud when I fart! That's why people think I'm so happy...
ReplyDeleteEugene Chang
Ok, so it looks like my wife already posted a story about our kids. I'll take a different approach.
ReplyDeleteYou recall that I left Chicago to move back to Atlanta just a few weeks after you and Kim were married back in 2001. Or maybe you don't remember. The timing of my move, that is, not your wedding.
Anyway, my mom, who had Lou Gehrig's disease, was pretty much immobile at that point and needed a lot of help with anything physical.
So one Saturday afternoon, she was in her usual chair in her bedroom and I was lying on my parents' bed. We were watching college football. And yes, there was a 50-something Korean immigrant mom who enjoyed watching college football, and also probably knew more about the Atlanta Braves than I did.
At some point late in the afternoon, I fell asleep. I awaoke some time later to a darkened room, the TV still on, and my mom on the verge of tears. She said she had tried to wake me up several times, but that I refused to stir from my slumber. It was pure torture, she said. I told her I was so sorry I fell asleep and left her by herself alone and in the dark for what turned out to be about 2 hours. She said that it wasn't being left alone in the dark that bothered her. It was the fact that ESPN2 had switched to NASCAR after the football game ended!! She was stuck sitting there, unable to change the channel, forced to watch NASCAR for the last 90 minutes!!! PURE TORTURE!!!!
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteA Chicago couple decided to go to Mexico to thaw out during a particularly cold winter.
ReplyDeleteThey planned to stay at the same hotel where they spent their honeymoon 20 years earlier.
Because of their hectic schedules, it was difficult to coordinate their travel schedules. So, the husband left Chicago and flew to Mexico on Friday, and his wife was to fly down the following day.
The husband checked into the hotel and since there was a computer in his room, he decided to send an email to his wife.
However, he accidentally left out one letter in her email address, and without noticing his error, sent the email to the wrong person.
Meanwhile, somewhere in Texas, a widow had just returned home from her husband's funeral. He was a minister who was called home to glory after suffering a heart attack.
The widow decided to check her email, expecting messages from relatives and friends.
After reading the first email, she screamed and fainted. The widow's son rushed into the room, found his mother on the floor, and then looked up at the computer screen which read:
To: My Loving Wife
Subject: I Have Arrived!
Dearest Love,
I know you are surprised to hear from me. They have computers here now, and you are allowed to send emails to your loved ones. I have just arrived and been checked in.
I see that everything has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow, and I look forward to seeing you then.
Hope your journey is as uneventful as mine was.
PS. Sure is hot down here!!
When I first read this I was cracking up...:D hope it brings a smile and laugh to you guys! :D btw, great idea Peter!! :D
ReplyDeleteDumb Questions from Lawyers:
The following questions by lawyers were taken from actual court documents in America:
1. "Was that the same nose you broke as a child?"
2. "Now doctor, is it not true that when a person dies in his sleep, in most cases he just passes quietly away and doesn’t know anything about it until the next morning?"
3.
Q: "What happened then?"
A: "He told me, ‘I have to kill you because you can identify me.'"
Q: "And did he kill you?"
4. "Was it you or your brother that was killed in the war?
5. "The youngest son, the twenty year old, how old is he?"
6. "Were you alone or by yourself?"
7. "Do you have any children or anything of that kind?"
8.
Q: "I show you exhibit 3 and ask you if you recognize that picture?"
A: "That’s me."
Q: "Were you present when he picture was taken?"
9. "Were you present in court this morning when you were sworn in?"
10.
Q: "Mrs. Johnson, how was your first marriage terminated ?"
A: "By death."
Q: "And by whose death was it terminated?"
11. "So you were gone until you returned?"
12.
Q: "She had three children right?"
A: "Yes."
Q: "How many were boys?"
A: "None."
Q: "Were there any girls?"
13. "You don’t know what it was, and you didn’t know what it looked like, but can you describe it?"
14.
Q: "You say the stairs went down to the basement?"
A: "Yes."
Q: "And these stairs, did they go up also?"
15.
Q: "Do you recall approximately the time that you examined the body of Mr. Edington at the Rose Chapel?"
A: "The autopsy started about 8:30 p.m."
Q: "And Mr. Edington was dead at that time?"
John was singing his heart out when Selah stopped him and said, "That's okay Daddy. Sometimes I think I sound better than I do too."
ReplyDeleteOur Selah's should really meet. :)
Are we still praying about the things in bold? :)
ReplyDelete"Paddle faster, I hear banjo music"
ReplyDeleteWe are from HBC Rolling Meadows and will be praying for your family on the road God is leading you. For humor, grab a tissue for tears of laughter and check out Tim Hawkins, who has unified our family far and wide in laughter. Many skits are on You Tube, but below are a couple links for starters:
ReplyDeletehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mZ5WzWWJy74&feature=related
http://timhawkins.net/video.html#!prettyPhoto/0/
Hi Kim & Peter! I'm working on an email but thought I'd drop in with a quick funny. It's at the expense of K & his fobbiness but if Kim laughs, it's worth it :). I write them down because no matter what, they make me laugh.
ReplyDeleteI'm poofed = I'm pooped
You are my girl = That's my girl
Cha cha! = Chop chop! (as in hurry up)
Zucchini = Jaccuzzi
It's such a beautiful weather! = What a nice day!
booby = boo boo (as in owie)
I make a nasty spaghetti = I make a mean spaghetti
And the always reliable, "Can I have a gum?"
Kim,
ReplyDeleteIf you are feeling down, maybe you can snack on some "Reese’s Pieces"....
or apply some eyeshadow to pretty yourself up, just make sure it’s the “Bone” shade.....
and if all else fails, take a ride in a small airplane and “eject” from the plane and have a nice ride.
Don’t worry...you and me, we think about the same things. =D
I'm in the waiting room of the doctor's office with my son Jaden (who at the time just turned 5). Sitting in the room is a rather obese man. Out of the blue, Jaden loudly proclaims, "Dad, that man has a huge, fat belly. It's so fat."
ReplyDeleteI quickly give Jaden's arm a tight squeeze, basically communicating, be quiet, while giving the stranger sitting across from us an apologetic, sheepish glance.
The man clears his throat and steps out of the room. As soon as the door closes, I tell Jaden how rude that was. Jaden looks honestly perplexed. "But he was fat." Realizing my son was simply sharing his observation with no ill content, I tell him, "Next time you want to say something, just tell it to daddy's ear first, and then I can tell you if it's rude or not."
As soon as I finish my sentence, the man walks back to the waiting room. He gives me a quick look and a grunt as if to confirm that I've muzzled my kid. Not even 30 seconds goes by before Jaden scoots over closer to me. He cups my face and tilts my head drawing his mouth near my ear, and then loudly says, "DAD, THAT MAN HAS A FAT BELLY!"
It was an awkward wait to say the least.
one simple memory I have of Peter growing up is when he used to spend time in front of the bathroom mirror...
ReplyDeletestanding about 4 feet away from the mirror, he’d tilt his chin up, wrinkle his forehead and have a look of smolder (tight-lipped yet audibly inhaling and exhaling), while turning his head from side to side. (perhaps to get a good look from all angles.) And that was just his facial expression...and as most guys do, widening his chest, flexing, and touching his pecs.
don’t know why I remember this so vividly, either I was in awe of him... or I was wondering what the heck he was doing. I guess it’s the same as us ladies having that “look” in the mirror after applying make-up, all wide-eyed or as Tyra Banks says it, “sm-‘eyez’ing”.
nothing really funny about it but funny to picture...maybe he still does it at home? =D
Love ya, big bro!
(I’ve just begun...hopefully you don’t “block” my comments...)
Hi Kim:
ReplyDeletePerhaps a homeschooling anecdote or two? It was our first day of homeschooling ever, and we were all excited. So first thing I sat us all down and began by saying that I don't know what I am doing. I have never been a teacher, and I am basically clueless. Now, I was going somewhere important with this whole speech when Hannah interrupts me and says in a shocked, dismayed way, "Mom, you're NOT supposed to tell US that!!" Well, the point of the speech was to say that that was actually a good thing because it meant we had to rely on God everyday and that if we were successful, it would be clear it was all because of God. But I guess I didn't realize how that would sound to her! It was pretty funny.
So, we started on that note to hit another less than auspicious note later that day. Ever since we decided to homeschool, Jaynie kept insisting she wanted to be homeschooled. Well, I knew better and had already enrolled her in preschool but her school hadn't started yet. But she was so excited to homeschool so that first day I sat her down with a "fun, new" workbook to work on writing her letters. She literally was sitting for only about two minutes when she says, "This is boring. I'm leaving." And she got up and left. She never did come back to the homeschooling room that day and never mentioned wanting to be homeschooled again. I still crack up about it. Well, at least the other two like being homeschooled!
Love to you and our continual prayers.
Hi Peter and Kim,
ReplyDeleteNot too many words...since you're a baseball fan Peter:
Q. Where is the first baseball game in the Bible?
A. In the big inning, Eve stole first, Adam stole second.
Cain struck out Abel, and the Prodigal Son came home. The Giants
and the Angels were rained out.
1Co_13:7 Love...endures all things!
Mike and Julie
Just remember, Peter, you started it.
ReplyDelete1) Growing up every time my dad (who I pray is not reading this) needed to release some gas, he'd point his finger at us as if shooting us with his gaseous gun. If sitting down, it would mean the lean over also. If walking, he would make a point to dramatically stop to point at us. Pointing is rude but in our case it was deadly.
2) My mom (who I pray is not reading this), sis-in-law Robin and I signed up to take yoga on our recent cruise ship vacation. It was a small studio with only 8 of us total. Halfway through the class, we were holding a moderately difficult pose. Calm music playing, yoga instructor softly teaching and my mom lets a loud one rip.
3) After 8 years, I believe my mother-in-law (who I pray is not reading this) has finally become very comfortable with me. How do I know? You got it. If the toots could tell, we are as tight as can be. I love that whenever we visit now, I am guaranteed a symphony of sounds that rather than disgust seem to endear. Not that I expect Kim to feel the same way. Husband farts are outlawed; I'm sure there's a public health law about it somewhere. :)
Kim & Pete we are praying for all involved. I am doing a new study by Renee Swope from Proverbs 31 ministries called Confident Heart - deals with doubt. I just wanted to remind you both that doubt & hope cannot live in our hearts at the same time. Doubt blocks the promise of God's power & truth to change us from the inside out. Hang in there, you are right that Gods timing is not ours. my son was abducted when he was 9 and he didnt come back in our lives till 12 years later but our first visit we thought would be awkward & god removed that gap of time &we joked & laughed like time never passed. To the point our kids were in the car & my son yelled Mom, Ashley's picking on me- then he chuckled & said I have waited 12 years to do that. LOL We have gone through a rough patch with our son & now it impacts the lives of many - we are waiting again on the Lord but we know with confidence his purpose for our lives will be fulfilled just as yours. Keep your chin up. We will pray for encouragement & protection from doubt to every family member going through this so God can receive the glory & you all can shine as bright as the sun with his hope in your hearts. The Halls Family
ReplyDeletePeter,
ReplyDeleteAs guys, we love the sophomoric humor. I guess then I know why this video cracks me up. It's just the expression on the face of the guy getting "pranked" Check it out
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=04WmBA9ZxPU
A personal favorite You-tube video in the Huston home: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eBDQPYcyjqs
ReplyDeleteIn keeping with your post today, I have to share a joke I heard at Jr. High camp this summer:
Have you heard of the documentary movie called "Constipated?" Oh, never mind, it never came out.
1. what do you call a cute girl with no ears?..... Gywee-up-da
ReplyDelete2. what do you call the burnt rice on the bottom of a rice cooker?.... bobby brown..
3. what do you call a smelly bird?..... nem-sae...
4. what do vampires drink in the morning?....... Koh-pee
5. where do lettuces go to worship?....... the Sang-choo-ary
6. why did the ice cream get into the car?......Cha-ga-wah-suh......
7. what do you call a pre-occupied bean?....... Kong-bee-jee...
8. what do you get when you put a jacket in a blender?.... jamba juice...
9. what do you call a corny soup?..... SSUHLUNG TANG
10. Why did the smoker go to the racetrack? ... Mal-Bo-ro
Kim and Peter,
ReplyDeleteI don't have a joke, but our family thinks this video is hilarious.
http://YouTube.com/watch?v=12kj62nrOtk
If I didn't copy that right, google "just for laughs Pants ripping."
Another funny one is the just for laughs video with "blind man peeing.". Don't worry, guys, It's clean.
Love,
Sonia
We are in Brian and Grace's small group and they just gave us the link to your blog. Please know that we will be praying for you all from St. Louis.
ReplyDeleteLove in Christ, Mike and Linda Farley
Hey, Kim & Peter,
ReplyDeleteHere's one of my favorite videos of our boys. It's from Donnevan's 2nd birthday last November w. trick candles.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S8lQAhgM2Zs
(I guess it isn't that funny if you don't know who the people are in a video, but since you sort of know our boys (or at least who they came from!), I hope you get a kick out this!)
This is a joke that Rich and I first read in the Reader's Digest and we laughed until we cried. I still laugh every time I think of it. Hope you enjoy! Hugs and prayers to both of you!
ReplyDeleteA priest, a minister and a rabbi want to see who’s best at his job. So they each go into the woods, find a bear, and attempt to convert it. Later they get together. The priest begins:
“When I found the bear, I read to him from the Catechism and sprinkled him with holy water. Next week is his First Communion.”
“I found a bear by the stream,” says the minister, “and preached God’s holy word. The bear was so mesmerized that he let me baptize him.”
They both look down at the rabbi, who is lying on a gurney in a body cast.
“Looking back,” he says, “maybe I shouldn’t have started with the circumcision.”
Hi Kim!
ReplyDeleteMy sister sent this to me a while ago. It made me laugh because it is so true of our family, although we wouldn't dare tell umma:
http://jokegurus.com/2011/06/08/the-average-asian-woman-aging-process/
Love you and praying for you. Stay strong Kim. The Lord is good and He is carrying you every step of the way. Big Hugs from all of us!
Jay, Jen, Josiah, Jonathan and Joelle
Hey guys, thought I would try to share a funny story from childhood.
ReplyDeleteWhen I was in the third grade my mom asked me what I wanted to be for Halloween. I told her I wanted to be a bat because I had been reading some batman comics and thought this would be an awesome halloween costume. Bless her soul, my mom went to the fabric store and spent the next week sewing a costume that would transform me from a timid korean boy into a ferocious black bat. She even engineered large fabric wings that I could flap as I ran around in circles. I was so proud and couldn't wait to go to school the next morning.
When I got to school for halloween I was excited to show off my costume. The teachers lined us up so we could present our costumes to the other third grade home room classes and I was sure mine would impress my friends. As we visited the other classrooms I flapped my wings and tried to look as scary as possible.
In the last class there was a girl named Nicole that i had a crush on, and i was determined to impress her. I flapped, jumped, and danced around and was reveling in my performance as the scariest bat ever to ever appear in My elementary school. I was confident that Nicole would be amazed and that I would win her over.
As we were getting ready to leave her class i looked up, and there she was right in front of me with a smile on her face. I tried to contain myself while I waited for her to tell me how cool she thought my costume was. Instead she asked me the following question:
"Are you wearing a leotard?"
I hadn't realized it until then, but I was in fact, wearing my sister's black leotard.
Peter and Kim, we are praying for you in San Francisco. I think that laughter is something we should all cherish, so here goes:
ReplyDeleteWe were attempting to discipline our son, Parker, when he was three. He did not seem to be afraid of us in any way :-)
Theo wanted to show our little guy that his daddy was big and strong, and could threaten. He wanted to show him that by showing him 'the belt'.
You know how you can take a belt, fold it in half and snap it together to make a big sound?
Well, the nearest belt was Parker's sixteen inch, canvas belt.
He folded the belt in half and attempted to make a big snapping sound. The belt was so small and light, it barely made a sound! Theo had made such a big show of wanting to snap the belt, and when it didn't make a big snap, I lost it. I laughed so hard, tears came to my eyes.
I still don't think Parker is really threatened by us and our attempts at discipline.
My friend has a 9 years old son. One day they read Bible together. It was John 3:1 - 15, about a Pharisee who came to have a conversation with Jesus. His son told him that he can remember the name of the Pharisee. It surprised him so much.
ReplyDeleteDaddy: "Can you remember? Very good."
Son: "Yes. His name was Hippotamus."
May GOD always be with you and your wife
Hi Peter and Kim!
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry I don't have anything funny to share at this point, but I just wanted to let you both know that you're in my thoughts and prayers. I was listening to the song "My Beloved" sung by Kari Jobe and I thought of you.
Hi Peter and Kim, been a long time, but I want you and Kim to know that we are praying for Kim! My sister is a 15 year survivor of sarcoma - Kim, you can beat this!
ReplyDelete--- Whenever I need a laugh... I find this video on youtube (Today Show clip) and I'm literally in tears, everytime...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cgm3_jzcNm4
Love the reference to 'holy men'
---Recent conversation between my husband (Allen) and I. I'm cooking over the range...
Me: My friend Stacy is such a sweet girl, I should set her up with someone
Allen: Oh no...
Me: You know when you're happily married, you want to see your friends...
- As Allen quickly cuts in -
Allen:...miserable
https://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=493137196139
ReplyDeletebabysitter:"i will be right back Selah:"Miss B has to go potty"
ReplyDeleteSelah:"OK"
2mins later...
Selah:"I can see you Miss B, can you see me?"
Babysitter:"Where?"
Selah: "I'm under the door"
Baysitter: "Selah, your silly"
LOL
i know it's too late to "win" but i still wanted to share my funny....in light of your sharing, peter. since we're on the topic of bodily toxins. i just want you guys to know that my son matthew (5.5 years old) has loving called them "fart parfaits". so, often, if you ask him what he wants to eat or if you say that you're hungry, he'll offer up one of his specialties....fart parfaits!! lovely!! love you guys!!
ReplyDeleteHi Peter & Kim,
ReplyDeleteSo, are we measuring these funny/embarrassing stories on a gassy scale? If so, I have one for you (because I am never above self-humiliation).
About 2 years ago, I was at a MOPS meeting (Mothers of Preschoolers). It was our last meeting & one that your "Secret Mom" reveals herself to you. What is a Secret Mom? It is a mom who prays for you throughout the year & usually delivers secret goodies/gifts anonymously. So, moments before the great reveal, my stomach starts to turn. I failed to mention that at the beginning of each meeting we have a huge brunch, which can do a number of a person's digestive system if you overeat! So, I'm holding Nathaniel about to make a trip to the restroom, when my secret mom comes out of nowhere & introduces herself to me. I'm trying to carry on this conversation, when my intestines release a little pressure. No big deal, right? After all, I'm holding a 3 year old, whom I'm more than willing to let "take the fall" on this one. Except, Nathaniel turns to me with a look of disgust & yells "You just farted!". As any good mom would do, I decide to keep a straight face, deny it, and try to continue the conversation. However, he won't give up accusing me so I decide to put him down - BIG MISTAKE! A few seconds later, I feel this little sniffing nose go right into my backside & then a loud "Yup, it was you! I can smell it!"....Needless to say, that conversation wrapped up quickly! I can still hear that mom's giggles as she walked away!
Hope you get lots of laughter from all these stories! It is truly the best medicine. Kim, you are continuously in our prayers. We are sending lots of love your way!
Ok, I think I am out of the running for the contest but I definitely wanted to share a joke, this one is straight from Warren Buffett's mouth, So here it goes:
ReplyDeleteWarren was starting to get worried about his partner Charlie Munger's hearing, so he went to the doctor and asked what he should do for his friend, how to bring it up, etc as it is a delicate subject telling your friend that they are losing their hearing.
The doctor recommends to first assess how bad it really is by testing at what distance Charlie can start hearing what Warren is saying.
So Warren goes back to work that day and stands across the room from Charlie and says "Hey Charlie, Microsoft is at $34, do you think we should buy?", Charlie had no response. :(
Warren steps to the middle of the room as says again, "Hey Charlie, Microsoft is at $34, do you think we should buy?", again no response, Warren is realizing that this is a lot worse than he thought :(
Warren goes right up next to Charlie's ear and repeats for the third time, "Hey Charlie, Microsoft is at $34, do you think we should buy?" to which Carlie responds, "For the 3rd time Warren, yes I think we should buy." - LOL, looks like Warren should get some hearing aids!
Hope this brought at least a little chuckle into your life today.
My prayers are with you both - Erika Gjovik
Daniel wants you to get better too!
ReplyDeletehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QzMCdUqY7XQ&blend=1&lr=1&ob=video-mustangbase
hopefully this makes you laugh :)
also, this.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HvAfrNVc_NY&feature=related
skip to 5 minutes.
i thought this was particularly funny since I remember my first time singing this song... IN WORSHIP WITH [PASTOR] KIM.
:)
sorry, this too.
ReplyDeleteOkay, i'm done. I promise.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O37FbeIUHY8
Daniel says you are loved!!! :)
My high school friend, Sandy, has been following the blog posts I've been sharing on facebook. Sandy is fighting breast cancer and is currently undergoing chemo. She asked me to pass on her blog post about this very thing. http://sandygledhill.wordpress.com/2011/08/25/cancer-is-not-funny/
ReplyDeletePeter, don't underestimate kim's super human ability to smell. when i was pregnant, I had a heightened sense of smell....one day dave let one out and it made me vomit. don't do that to your wife.
ReplyDeletehi kim & peter,
ReplyDeletei was going to write a really funny story about the first & last time i babysat for you guys (HAHAHAHA), but i decided that this video is prob funnier. i know the "contest" is over, but i thought you guys would get a kick outta this. lol. enjoy!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jCEkG-n0hbE
meeyoung (from calvary)
hi kim & peter,
ReplyDeletei was going to write a really funny story about the first & last time i babysat for you guys (HAHAHAHA), but i decided that this video is prob funnier. i know the "contest" is over, but i thought you guys would get a kick outta this. lol. enjoy!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jCEkG-n0hbE
meeyoung (from calvary)
A couple was celebrating their golden wedding anniversary.
ReplyDeleteTheir domestic tranquility had long been the talk of the town, and on this special occasion, a local newspaper reporter paid them a visit. He inquired as to the secret of their long and happy marriage.
"Well," explained the husband, "it all goes back to our honeymoon.
We visited the Grand Canyon and took a trip down to the bottom of the canyon by pack mule.
We hadn't gone too far when my wife's mule stumbled."
My wife quietly said
'That's once.' We proceeded a little farther when the mule stumbled again. Once more my wife quietly spoke: 'That's twice.' We hadn't gone a half-mile when the mule stumbled a third time. My wife promptly removed a revolver from her purse, hopped down off the beast, and shot the mule dead. "
"I started to protest over her treatment of the mule when she looked at me and quietly said, 'Thats once.'"
My husband is a true gentleman and still doesn't fart in front of me. Well, so he thought. One day, I was by our bedroom closet doors when I hear him rushing in to the room, lying on the bed, and letting out a super loud/long/wet one. I turned to him and said "Um, Babe?" You can imagine his facial expression. "Oh my gosh, I came to our room to be alone. I thought you were downstairs!"
ReplyDelete